If you were raised on early 2000s magazines, you already know the damage they did. I'll wholly admit they did some damage to me. Absorbing all the photos of perfectly photoshopped curves, how to dress, and how to get the healthiest and shiniest hair and perfect skin when you're a hormone ridden teenager really isn't helpful.
Pages upon pages telling us we should to be smaller. Always. Smaller stomachs, achieving the thigh gap, flatter everything (while still being a D cup?). They've taught us to look in the mirror and scan for flaws, not beauty. And for one of my recent clients, like many of us, that messaging has stuck with her.
My client has struggled with body dysmorphia for majority of her life. And even though she was interested in booking a boudoir session, she was still hesitant. Thoughts like "I don't know if I've hit my goal yet to be ready for a shoot", and "I don't think my body will look right" are still haunting.
Which honestly, hurts my heart, and I understand.
We kept things simple. No pressure to pose a certain way. No expectation to “perform sexy.” Just a safe space, soft light, music, and some posing guidance. The session wasn't about lingerie, it was about letting go and re-connecting to herself.
After getting in the groove she started coming up with posing ideas, wanting more creative outfits, and owning the space. Throughout the session, there were moments where I'd share a photo and she’d pause and say, “I can’t believe that’s me.” Her honest shock made me truly excited. It was like she was meeting a version of herself she’d been too hard on for too long. I know this sounds cheesy, but it's so lovely to hear as a photographer and know she truly felt that confidence creeping in.
I get it. When you've spent years nitpicking every photo, avoiding mirrors, or wishing you had someone else’s body, seeing yourself with gentler eyes can feel almost surreal. She kept saying "My husband always tells me I'm a 10 and I never believe it, but I think I'm getting it." That told me I was doing my job right, and she was seeing what a stunning person she truly is.
Boudoir can absolutely be about feeling sexy, bold, powerful. But sometimes it’s about learning to feel kind and compassionate toward yourself. Especially if you’ve been stuck in the loop of "not-enoughness" for way too long.
You don’t have to be 100% confident to book a session. In fact, most people aren’t. But if you’re tired of the inner critic, if you're done letting old messages define how you see yourself, or even if you're just curious — boudoir might be the exact reminder you need.
Your body isn’t broken or made wrong. You were just taught to believe it was. You deserve to feel seen, celebrated, and deeply worthy — just as you are.
I promise, even though it could feel daunting to have it all out there, it will be a safe space to be yourself, your and you're worth it.
** All photos remain completely private and require your explicit permission to be released
